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Home Blog Relationships Sexuality?I want to talk about one of the most common complaints I hear in my office almost daily that potentially wreaks havoc on relationships. It about control. I think you get the picture.More from YourTango: 7 moncler outlet store Ways Love Transforms Your cheap moncler coats BrainSo here the deal: people we label as being controlling do not feel powerful and in control. In fact, paradoxically they typically feel lonely, alone and frustrated, and very much not in control. They often feel this way because what they do is very off putting. In fact, they feel very powerless, but nevertheless continue their pursuit of control. Some become loud, cheap moncler jackets sale or critical, blurring the distinction between being powerful, versus overpowering. This is also referred to as going along to get along. Typically, those who feel controlled by the controlling one simply want them to shut up or stop. Unfortunately, one way to do that, as for a while, is by moncler outlet complying. Complying only serves to reinforce the controlling behavior, and the controlling behavior reinforces the resentment that accompanies compliance. Not a good way to run a railroad!So, why are some people so controlling in the first place? cheap moncler jackets Think of it this this way: control is always about relief. That right it about relief! The questionis, relief from what?In general they want relief from some sort of internal emotional pain. They experience a painful internal state they do not express directly. moncler outlet uk It might be set of feelings moncler sale outlet that they can seem to express or reduce such as anxiety, defuse fear, chronic nervousness, anger or hurt. Go together!After all, you both desperately want relief moncler jackets outlet and this is a very difficult pattern to break, and both of you play crucial roles in creating it, and breaking it. From dating to marriage, parenting to empty nest, relationship challenges to relationship success, YourTango is at the center of the conversations that are closest to our over 12 million readers’ hearts. With daily contributions from our experts, we have a little something for everyone looking to create healthier lives.Most Popular PostsAngry All the Time for No Reason? This Might Be WhyLearning straight from the source to Let Go moncler outlet jackets of Past Hurts: 5 Ways to Move OnWhen You Feel Empty: What It Means What to DoThe 3 Basic Types of Descriptive Research Methods10 Tips to Mend a Broken HeartFrom Our BlogsToday I Love Having A Day OffPodcast: A Mindful Approach to Overcoming AddictionSingle People, https://www.beautylyrics.com moncler outlet Stop Saying You Are Selfish!How the Narcissist Hurts You Using Cognitive EmpathyUsing cheap moncler Employee Assistance Programs to Improve Workplace Mental Health. Is There Such a Thing as Too Much Daydreaming.
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